When I was growing up, I was not much into social contact. My mum used to say on various occasions, that I was 'living in my world' or 'closing myself up'. I usually did not understand why would she complain about that or sometimes even why did she even think so. It felt rather rejecting to me, so I just dismissed it as another thing which did not make sense. However, the true was, that checking out from everyday life reality was my most favorite type of escape. I loved reading and I fed my imagination with all sorts of adventurous stories in order to re-live them in all kinds of different settings. It does not cost anything in material sense and it makes you safe and free. You can be anything, anywhere, anytime. You can visit exotic places, you can search treasures and fight for justice. You can face the challenge and be yourself in the place where your rules apply. It just makes you isolated and lonely. But to me it felt fine. It is better to be lonely in the nice place than to be lonely in dangerous and chaotic reality. It took me some time to realize that this is not the helthiest activity one can do and that fighting imaginatory evil does not really solve the real ones. Now I do not use imagination for escapism anymore. But I have realized how powerful tool it may be for practicing social skills. And I think there is actually also a lot of other things which this defence-strategy taught me.
Apart from providing basic value structure, teaching about world and developing creativity, reading fictional stories actually increases empathy. The stories allow reader to feel into the main character's identity and see motives and actions of other people through his eyes. As a kid I desperately needed a hero and main characters of my books gave me image of person I admired and which I would like to become. Nowadays while playing DnD I see it like a great tool not only of self-discovery, but also way of commuication between people. While my boyfriend is narrating and I am receiving the story, we are sharing one fantasy world which is only between us two. We are tuned to each other, listening to each other's emotional responses, sharing the same exicments and fun wile challanging and teasing each other. It is one of the best ways how to get to really know the person. You discover what he admires, what upsets him and what he fears. And you see how he is getting to know you better and better. People learn to cooperate better. It is fantastic to be sorrounded by nerds who love dreaming just as much as you do. One is free to explore, but also needs to find the balance between self-realization and team game. It teaches great skill of involving everyone into the play. It boosts creativity, relieves the stress and challenges the brain. And this all safely with some good food and drinks added to the session. Dreaming is great.
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